Here are two consecutive chapters somewhere in the book that I am currently writing. Please take the time to read them and comment on what you think.
I have not been through them with a fine tooth comb, so spelling and grammar errors noticed would be appreciated too.
At first Derek and Rose thought the loss of appetite, facial swelling, chest pain, weakness and fever were just part of her pregnancy and to be fair so did her Doctor. They carried on for six weeks totally oblivious of the horror that awaited them. It was the happiest time of their lives, both in terms of growing up and being together. Meeting each other and getting married was thrilling enough but having a child was just in a whole new category of happiness. They had begun preparing the house and the small bedroom for the nursery. Derek had worked overtime so he could buy a cot and decorate the room in a neutral colour in case of a boy or a girl. Rose had not been feeling well at all but had decided that the Doctor knew best and if she said that it was just normal pregnancy pains then she would just have to grit her teeth and get on with it. There were days when Rose just simply could not go on and had to leave work sick and just go home and rest, but again friends and her Doctor all told her that it was normal.
It was 4 months into her pregnancy when one morning after Derek had made her breakfast in bed as usual; she began to cough like she had swallowed something the wrong way but the coughing did not stop, it only became loud and harder. That loud and hard in fact that Derek heard her from outside in the garden at the opposite end of the house. Derek ran into the house and up the stairs as fast as he could to his beloved. He began patting Rose on her back and then rubbing her back in circles. Her face was becoming grey and pale, Derek did not know what else to do so he gave her one last whack in the middle of her shoulder blades and the coughing started to slow down and then stop. As Rose began to compose herself and started to breath normally again she removed her hands away from her mouth and smiled at Derek. Rose looked puzzled at the expression on Derek’s face as it changed almost immediately from relief to panic in a split second.
“What’s wrong?” Rose asked.
“You have …erm… blood on your teeth and in your mouth” Derek replied in shock. Rose looked down into her still cupped hands and began to scream. In the palms of her hands were two blood clots the size of thumb tack heads in a small puddle of blood that was now dripping down onto the bed covers underneath. Derek turned around and began to run away.
“Where are you going?” Rose shouted.
“To call an ambulance” Derek replied already striding down the stairs by now.
“Come back here and hold me first” Rose told him but he had already gone. When he returned a few minutes later Rose was sobbing uncontrollably. Derek put his arms around his wife and just held her until they heard the ambulance racing through the estate. Derek got up, opened the upstairs window and beckoned the ambulance driver and partner upstairs and told them that the door was open.
Derek sat at Rose’s bedside even when he was ordered to leave by the snotty, fat arsed sister.
“I am not leaving her even if there was a bomb threat on the hospital grounds” he told her. He sat and waited whilst she rested and occasionally woke up to cough again. He held her hand during her having blood taken, the chest x-rays, the scan and the numerous times the nurses asked for the same information. Derek was starting to become extremely angry but Rose, being a nurse herself understood and told him to calm down on numerous occasions. All evening and into the night Derek stayed by her bedside, the only time leaving was to make toilet visit, food visits and to keep the family updated. On returning from breakfast the following morning he found his beloved crying for the dozenth time since her admission. He knelt on the bed and comforted her as best he could. All of a sudden his heart literally jumped into his mouth as Rose whispered in his ear “They think I have lung cancer.”
In the next day or so the Doctors had given Rose an ultimatum, she had to either carry on and give birth or try to save her own life or forego her babies. This was not something either of them had contemplated happening and Derek knew that he had no say in the decision, even though he wanted Rose and only his Rose. After another day the Doctors were pestering Rose for an answer but she was not ready. The Doctors told her that the quicker she made up her mind, the quicker they could try to help her. Rose finally confided in Derek.
“I don’t want any treatment my love” she told Derek “I do not want to go through the pain of the treatment when I am going to die anyway.” Tears began to stream down Derek’s cheeks. Hearing the words coming out of her mouth was the hardest thing he had experienced in his life. He knew deep down that the treatment would only prolong the fact that she was dying but he had been in blissful denial up until this point.
“I want to carry on for the 5 months that I have left with the feeling of having a life growing inside of me” Rose told him.
“The baby may not survive long enough inside of you if the cancer has spread that far” Derek explained.
“I know my darling but that is the price I am willing to take” she answered “If there is a way that they can keep the cancer away from the baby as much as possible then I would rather do that and give it a chance at life than end its life and then I eventually die too leaving you with nothing.”
Derek knew that was not going to happen but what was he to say? He couldn’t dash the only hopes that she had about giving birth before she died, so he begrudgingly went along with his wife’s wishes and agreed to take care of her at home with the help of the hospital if needed. Derek excused himself an hour later for a toilet break and searched the hospital for Rose’s Doctor. When he found him he asked him to give him some honest answers.
“I am sorry but I cannot discuss your wife’s condition without her present” the Doctor stated.
“Okay Doctor will you just answer me this hypothetical question?” Derek asked hopingly.
“Yes, okay then” the Doctor agreed.
“If a woman who has lung cancer decides that she wishes to give birth and only receive treatment that would help the baby’s chances of survival; would you expect it to be a success?” Derek asked. The Doctor said nothing but shook his head and walked away.
Rose returned home and was immediately met by her parents, Derek’s family and their mutual friends in the space of two days, all of them offering to help so Derek could still work and take care of Rose too. Her parents were devastated as Rose was their only child and it seemed to hit them even harder than it would have done if it were him. Clive sent a message of sympathy from abroad as he had been stationed in a top secret operation but could always send and receive messages through the army mail. When Derek’s family had visited, Heather was very quiet and it was not like her, she seemed to stay away from Rose as much as possible. Still being a teenager she appeared scared that she may catch this cancer if she got too close. Rose was brilliant; she reached over and held out her hand towards Heather. “Don’t worry my little flower” she began “you cannot catch this. I have it from years of smoking so if you don’t want it then don’t start, okay?” Heather nodded and the image of her sister in law telling her that was imprinted for the rest of her life. After everyone who ever knew either of them had visited Derek and Rose came up with plans for when certain things were going to happen and how things were going to take place after she had died. They both hated discussing it as they wanted the rest of their lives together to be as happy as possible. It’s just they felt, that this way, they could get it out of the way and then enjoy the rest of it.
One day in the following week when Derek returned home from work he found one of Rose’s friends, Rebecca sitting on the couch with Rose and she was smoking.
“What the hell is going on here?” Derek asked.
“Relax Derek, its cannabis” Rebecca stated. Derek took a few seconds for those words in the same sentence to make sense. When they didn’t he became more angry.
“I say again, what the hell is going on?” he said.
“It’s okay darling” Rose started “I asked Rebecca to get me some as in my training one of the tutors told us off the record that the active chemical in marijuana, THC (TetraHydraCannabinol) has been suggested as a cure for cancer, and at the moment I am willing to try anything.”
“Are you two insane, what about the baby?” Derek said infuriatingly “GET OUT OF HERE REBECCA, NOW!” and Rebecca looked at Rose, picked up her coat and left looking behind her in case Derek kicked her arse out of the door.
“What are you thinking?” Derek asked Rose.
“What do you mean? I am in agony here and all you are worried about is the damn baby, not me” Rose said and then put her hands over her mouth. Derek turned around and walked out of the house, got into his car and drove.
After 72 minutes Derek returned home to find Rose sat in silence staring at the wall.
“Are you okay?” Derek asked and Rose remained silent.
“You are not making me feel like the guilty one in all of this” Derek began “It was you that asked Rebecca to get you a splif and then accused me of thinking more about the baby than you. All I want is you and I will never have the opportunity to grow old with you.” Derek began to weep and fell to his knees. Still Rose sat silent, seemingly taking in everything that Derek was saying but not being able to take it in.
“Are you listening to me?” he asked and after a few seconds “Well?”
Derek stood up and grabbed her shoulder, as he did her head fell backwards and Derek realised that she was no longer conscious.
Derek remained at Rose’s bedside with two heart monitors beeping away, one for Rose and one for the baby. The Doctor had told Derek that if Rose did not make it then the baby was too young to survive too. At 2.13am Rose passed away and so did their child.
There is a chapter that I REALLY want you all to read but I think it may spoil some of the story line. I am, however going to post it on here soon but it will be password protected. Those of you who know me will be able to guess the password.